However, there are dark forces afoot.
If you happen to be in someone's house, be it friend or relative, I challenge you to check their condiment cupboard, fridge or pantry and check out what's going on with the Ketchup situation. It's a true marker for life.
A: Glass bottle: good stuff nostalgia: I've recently got back into ELO (I can't it it out of my head - ha!) - guilty pleasure from my childhood - much like Colonel Wilma Deering from Buck Rogers, who used to make me go all funny and need a lie down. Still does in fact.
Yarp!And I currently can't stop playing Elton John's "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road" - now that IS a song. (particularly with the Muppets doing backing vocals).
However, if you're still bashing the arse out of a glass bottle of Heinz for any other reason than nostalgia, you perhaps need to move on.
B: Squeezy Ketchup. Now this individual is no stranger to change. Probably realised early that Betamax was going nowhere and grasped VHS with both hands. However, might still be waiting to see if the internet catches on. Unfortunately, the only justification for squeezy top-up ketchup is that it has be one of the cheap brands one might find in Aldi, and that unfortunately comes under guilty childhood pleasures (see above). Otherwise you're just not in the game.
C: Top-Down Ketchup, Now you're talking. These dudes are cutting edge. You should be honoured in their presence, they know their shit. They've purchased a ketchup product YOU DON'T EVEN NEED TO SHAKE! This is the kind of individual you want to employ, they're not only aware of new technology, they'll embrace it. They're frontier builders. They'll be with you every step if you want to change things.
However.....
D: Top-Down Ketchup Bottle Stored with the top up!
Aaaargh. Aaaaaaaaaargh! Double yew tee eff?
Seriously, these are the guys you need to look out for, in fact I'd even advocate testing people you're condsidering employing. It's simple, if they choose top-down ketchup but you find it in their cupboard with the top up, you need to worry.
Having worked in a vast global corp for many years, you come across people that superficially grasp change, they make the right noises but at the end of the day, behaviourally they're not committed and will always put the ketchup back in the cupboard with the lid at the top (metaphorically). Cowards and Luddites. They're not with you, they're just going through the right motions. Bin them.
My recommendation? Look for the guys who've binned ketchup altogether and have embraced Guinness-flavoured HP Sauce. They know where it's at.
No comments:
Post a Comment